**Appraisal Season**

Monday morning ka Gurgaon alag hi mood me tha. Office ke basement se leke 14th floor tak, sab log unusually polite lag rahe the, jaise kisi ne overnight sabke personalities par “soft skills” ka filter laga diya ho. Pantry me chai lene gaya toh Aarav ko sabse pehle yeh odd cheez dikhi ki jo log normally ek dusre ke coffee mugs bhi silently judge karte the, wahi ab “Arre, tumhara kaam kaisa chal raha hai?” aur “Need any help?” bol rahe the.

Aarav Mehta ne apni chai ka sip liya aur bas itna socha, Something is off. Aur sach mein, office me kuch toh off tha. Noida side se commute karke aane wali Neha Sood, jo usually seedha point pe baat karti thi, aaj smile ke saath “Good morning, Aarav, hope you had a restful weekend” bol rahi thi. Aarav ko laga ya toh office me HR audit aa gaya hai, ya phir appraisal season start ho gaya hai.

Phir uske phone par calendar ping aaya. Subject: Appraisal Discussion – Project Team Organizer: Neha Sood Time: Thursday, 11:30 AM

Bas. Aarav ne screen ko do second tak dekha, phir chai ka cup thoda aur tightly pakad liya. Appraisal. Matlab ab office ka asli season shuru. Jahan sabka asli face thoda blur ho jata hai aur sabka “team player” version HD mein aa jata hai.

Usne around dekha. Sanjay Verma, sales head, corridor me aise chal raha tha jaise office uska personal runway ho. Loud voice, broad smile, aur har do minute me kisi na kisi ko naam se bulakar “How’s life, champ?” type energy. Log usko waise bhi bhav nahi dete the, but appraisal ke time pe Sanjay ki extra helpfulness ek alag level pe chali jaati thi. Aaj woh ek junior ko bol raha tha, “Bhai, tu tension mat le, main hoon na.” Aarav ne mann hi mann kaha, Haan, tum ho na. Apni image ke liye sabse pehle.

Woh apni desk pe aaya aur laptop khola. Inbox me already teen mails pade the—“Quick help needed”, “Can you review this?”, aur “Just a small favor.” Small favor. Yeh do words appraisal season me dangerous hote hain. Inka matlab hota hai: Mera kaam kar do, aur badle me main yaad rakhunga… shayad, agar rating ka topic aaya toh.

Aarav normally quiet aur efficient tha. Kaam time pe, ghalat baat pe “noted,” aur drama se door. Office me aise logon ko aksar log “reliable” bol dete hain, but problem yeh thi ki reliable log invisible bhi ho jaate hain. Aur invisible logon ka appraisal kabhi kabhi spreadsheet me kho jaata hai. Aarav ko yeh baat pata thi. Isliye last two weeks se woh suddenly over-helpful ho gaya tha.

Usne ek junior ke report deck me help kar di. Ek colleague ke client mail ko polish kar diya. Ek aur team ke tracker me data fill kar diya, bina pooche ki woh actually uska kaam bhi nahi tha. Har help ke saath uske dimaag me ek chhota sa calculator chal raha tha—Ye mention hoga? Ye review me aayega? Kya Neha notice karegi?

Pantry me ussi waqt Sanjay aa gaya. “Arre Aarav, tu toh hero nikla yaar,” usne khaas loud tone me bola, taaki side ke do log bhi sun lein. “Suna hai tune Riya ka deck bhi fix kar diya? Team spirit ho toh aisa.” Aarav ne halka sa smile kiya. “Bas help kar di.” Sanjay ne shoulder pat kiya. “Exactly! That’s what I like. Logon ko lift karna chahiye.”

Aarav ko almost hansi aa gayi. Sanjay ka “lift” usually tab yaad aata tha jab usko apni image ko thoda aur polished banana hota tha. Office me sabko pata tha ki Sanjay ki kindness selective hai. Jahan usko credit mil sakta tha, wahan woh “supportive” hota tha. Jahan actual messy work hota tha, wahan uske calls suddenly unreachable ho jaate the.

Tabhi Neha pantry ke door pe aayi. “Guys,” woh bolti hai, “Thursday ke liye apne achievements aur blockers bhej dena. Please, concise and honest.” Honest word par Aarav ka eyebrow thoda upar chala gaya. Neha ne shayad notice kiya, ya shayad usne notice karne ka pretend kiya. “Seriously,” woh thoda softer tone me boli, “I need the right context for the review cycle.”

Aarav ne bas “Sure” bola. Neha ki tone polite thi, but Aarav ko uske face pe woh pressure clearly dikh raha tha jo manager log usually carry karte hain aur office me kisi ko dikhne nahi dete. Upper management ko pleasing bhi karna hai, team ko motivate bhi karna hai, aur saath me ratings ka kaanta bhi sambhalna hai. Mid-level manager hona bhi ek alag hi treadmill hai.

Do din tak office me fake favors ka avalanche chalta raha. Koi kisi ke liye coffee la raha tha, koi suddenly “Let me help with that deck” bol raha tha, koi senior ke overused joke pe zyada zor se hans raha tha. Aarav ne toh ek point pe dekha ki Sanjay ne lunch order bhi “team ke liye” place kar diya hai. “Bhai sabko ek jaisa,” Sanjay ne announce kiya, “I care about fairness.” Aarav ne under-breath murmur kiya, “Fairness aur tum? Rare combo.”

Thursday ko calibration room ka naam sunte hi office me ek alag hi silence aa gayi. Ye woh room tha jahan real decisions bante the, aur baahar wale bas guess karte rehte the ki andar kya hua. Ritika Bansal, HR/People Ops wali, hamesha cheerful rehti thi, par calibration ke time uske smile me bhi ek carefulness aa jaati thi. Aarav ne usse coffee machine ke paas roka.

“Ritika, ek honest question,” Aarav ne kaha. “Ye ratings actually kaise decide hoti hain?” Ritika ne ek second usko dekha, phir halka sa sigh kiya. “Official answer ya real answer?” “Real answer.” Woh thoda dheere boli, “Performance dekha jaata hai. Visibility bhi. And… calibration mein team ka balance bhi. Sab kuch pure numbers se nahi hota.” Aarav ko wahi sunna tha, but sunke accha nahi laga. Ritika ne uski taraf dekha. “Tumhara kaam solid hai, Aarav. Bas tum apne kaam ko loud enough nahi banate.”

Ye line seedha chhati me lagi. Solid. Loud enough nahi. Matlab kaam theek hai, par market me bechna bhi aana chahiye.

Usi shaam Sanjay ne ek aur performative act kiya. Woh pantry me aaya aur bola, “Guys, kal review hai. Main toh keh raha hoon, jo bhi help chahiye ho, bolo. We’re one team.” Phir usne Aarav ko side me le jaake baja kiya, “Waise, ek chhota kaam kar de? Mere ek client update deck ka last section polish kar de. Kal subah tak. Tu toh kar hi lega.” Aarav ne uski taraf dekha. “Kal mera review hai.” Sanjay hansa, jaise usne koi cute excuse suna ho. “Arre, bas half hour ka kaam hai. Aur waise bhi, team ke liye kar raha hai na.”

Us moment pe Aarav ko samajh aaya ki yeh fake helpfulness ka trap hai. Agar woh haan bolta, toh Sanjay uska use karke apni image aur boost karega. Agar na bolta, toh shayad “team player” label aur thoda weak ho jaaye. Usne deep breath li. “Nahi, Sanjay. I can’t.” Sanjay ka smile ek second ke liye freeze hua. “Oh. Okay.” Bas itna hi. Par us “Okay” mein chhota sa threat chipka hua tha.

Friday ko Aarav ka appraisal meeting tha. Neha uske saamne bethi thi, laptop open, notes ready. Room quiet tha, AC ki halki humming aur corridor se aati distant keyboard tapping ke alawa kuch nahi. Neha ne formal tone me shuru kiya. “Aarav, overall your delivery has been consistent. You’re dependable, deadlines miss nahi hote, and stakeholders have positive feedback.”

Aarav ne sirf nod kiya. Phir Neha ne thoda pause kiya. “But… you need to speak up more. Apni contributions ko visible banana padega.” Aarav ne seedha usko dekha. “Matlab kaam karna enough nahi hai?” Neha ne pen down kiya. “I know it sounds unfair. But appraisal season me jo cheez log notice karte hain, woh sirf output nahi hota. It’s also communication, presence, and… perception.”

Aarav ke andar jo frustration tha, woh ekdum se surface pe aa gaya. “Perception hi sab kuch hai?” usne quietly poocha. “Toh phir jo log actual work karte hain but loud nahi hote, unka kya?” Neha ne usko kuch seconds tak dekha. Uski aankhon me irritation nahi thi, bas thakan thi. “Unka kaam important hai,” woh boli, “but I won’t lie—system loud logon ko zyada reward karta hai.”

Yeh sunke Aarav ko laga jaise kisi ne uske dimaag ki exact file open kar di ho. Woh pehli baar seedha bola, “Main invisible rehne ki koshish nahi kar raha tha. Main bas kaam kar raha tha. Phir laga ki agar main apne aap ko push nahi karunga, toh rating bhi quietly nikal jayegi.” Neha ka face soft hua. “I know.” “Do you?” “More than you think.”

Usne laptop band kiya, aur thoda lean forward hui. “Sach bolun? Mujhpe bhi pressure hai. Upper management numbers aur narratives dono dekh raha hai. Mujhe bhi choose karna padta hai ki kiski contribution ko strong case banana hai. Sometimes I hate it.” Aarav ne usko pehli baar manager ke role se zyada, ek phanse hue insaan ki tarah dekha.

Meeting ke baad corridor me Ritika mil gayi. Uske haath me appraisal forms ka stack tha, aur face pe woh same diplomatic smile, but aankhon me thodi exhaustion. “Kaise raha?” usne poocha. Aarav ne half-smile diya. “Interesting. System thoda… predictable nikla.” Ritika ne ek chhota sa laugh diya, phir thoda low voice me boli, “Honestly? Kaafi decisions pehle se tilt ho chuke hote hain. Forms bas usko language dete hain.” Aarav ruk gaya. Ritika ne apni voice aur dheemi ki. “I’m not supposed to say this, but transparency ka full version yahan kisi ke paas nahi hota. We try to make it fair, but fair aur possible—dono same cheez nahi hote.”

Ye thi truth-bomb. Softly said, but impact hard tha.

Ussi waqt Sanjay corridor se nikla, phone ka speaker on tha, kisi client ko bol raha tha, “Yes yes, team is fantastic. I always support my people.” Usne Aarav ko dekhte hi call mute kiya. “Aur bhai, deck ka kya hua?” Aarav ne seedha uski aankhon me dekha. “Maine nahi kiya.” Sanjay ka smile tight ho gaya. “What do you mean?” “Matlab nahi kiya. Kyunki mera review tha. Aur kyunki tumhari ‘team support’ ka matlab sirf tab kaam aata hai jab tumhe kaam chahiye hota hai.”

Corridor me ek second ke liye silence ho gaya. Do juniors side se guzre, speed thodi slow kar li, jaise office ka invisible gossip radar on ho gaya ho. Sanjay ne hansi ka mask pehna. “Aarav, don’t be dramatic.” Aarav ne calmly bola, “I’m not. Main bas ab fake helpful nahi banunga.”

Sanjay kuch bolta, usse pehle Neha wahan aa gayi. Usne situation ko ek glance me samajh liya. Phir usne ek decision liya—small, but meaningful. “Aarav,” woh boli, “I’ve updated your review notes. Your ownership on the client escalation and the process cleanup will be explicitly mentioned. This should have been highlighted earlier.” Aarav ne usko dekha. “Thanks,” woh bas itna hi bol paaya.

Neha ne thoda aur clearly add kiya, “And for the record, visibility ka issue sirf tumhara nahi hai. We need to stop rewarding noise as much as actual work.” Sanjay ka face ek second ke liye blank ho gaya. Ritika, jo thodi door khadi thi, bas ek tiny satisfied nod dekar chal di—jaise usne apna chhota sa truth quota fulfill kar diya ho.

Us weekend Aarav ne office ka laptop bina guilt ke band kiya. Uske rating ka result abhi final nahi tha, par ek cheez clear thi: woh ab sirf survival mode me nahi rahega. Usne decide kar liya tha ki kaam karega bhi, aur apni value ko clearly claim bhi karega. Har baar fake helpfulness ka mask pehenna zaroori nahi. Real value loud ho sakti hai, bina fake banaye.

Monday ko pantry me chai lete waqt usne notice kiya ki office ka mood ab bhi appraisal ke baad wala hi tha—thoda relieved, thoda tired. Sanjay usual confidence me wapas ja chuka tha, but uski extra sweetness ki plastic shine thodi dull pad gayi thi. Neha ne ek brief smile diya, aur Ritika ne wahan se guzarte hue aankh se hi “good luck” type signal diya.

Aarav ne chai ka sip liya aur khud se kaha, Maybe invisible rehna safe lagta hai, but safe and seen are not the same thing. Aur pehli baar usne yeh baat bina ghabrahat ke sochi.

Storydilse ke pyaare readers, itna saath dene ke liye dil se thank you. Aapke pyaar aur time ka hum hamesha shukriya ada karte hain. Aise hi hamari kahaniyon ke saath jude rahiye, aur apna khayal rakhiye.